Does your career reflect your life?

I really don't know where to start.. I like music, I pride myself in how much I enjoy it and I'll even sing along to stuff that sounds good. Lets see, I don't know if this stereotype is true or not but as most people mature they go through stages where they might change what sort of things to take interest in, right? Well, as a kid my household was very loud because my mom threw parties...she had me when she was 17 got pregnant at 16...so I guess you could say I grew up on party music/hippie music/rocker music...now when I say party music I don't mean the satellite channel definition...I'm talking about the stuff you drink to, play drinking games to, smoke to and sometimes get in trouble for listening to. This fact might seem irrelevant to the matter at hand but I'd like to think that I was intelligent for trying to distance myself from that lifestyle as much as possible. Well you could imagine the kind of childhood I had after that fact BUT I was always so aware of what was going on and I always told myself I'm greater than that chaos. I went through my times of underage drinking, run-ins with the cops, smoking stuff and the world I lived in could have crippled me for life had it not been for my own will to change before I ended up like my mom, an only parent with 6 kids 4 different fathers, and drugs as a best friend. Well I didn't fit in with your sons and daughters and their sheltered lives so I never made friends with the high school coaches or teachers but not because I was so under-cled but because there was no way I could. No way I would get any comfort in conforming to the regularity of a school day. Heck, I was pretty good at reading the book of life and from my perspective I had to endure witnessing the world around me and learning from it consequentially. When I was in about 4th grade I learned that home wasn't safe, the streets weren't safe, and school wasn't safe because all of these things were hurting me. SO I played with my legos, collected the neighborhood supply of trading cards and tried my hand at participating in school activities like in-school soccer. I liked to draw and stuff because I would get compliments on my pictures and I could do a pretty good job. Anyway, my grades in school were always a reflection of both my internal state and the external world I lived in. Almost didn't make it through high school...none of my "friends" did and I'm just a freshman in college this year! I sure as hell didn't take any AP cles or do much sports, I was too busy trying to get a grip on life, one which was intelligent and fair, one which I value. But I made it out with a diploma, over the years my math skills deteriorated and I think it's because math requires a steadier hand than an artists. I didn't end up getting serious with art because it was too free and with freedom came danger, I used art as a symbolic expression of the life I lived which could be looked at in so many ways, I chose the cynic approach. My senopr year in high school I landed a role in the theatre prodution, a lead role, and that was a really different experience. I didn't know what I was in for and it wasn't what I expected. The high school shows I went to when I was younger seemed so much more exquisite. I ended up writing some spoken poetry but that didn't last because I realized the stuff I was writing was completely immature. I was so preoccupied with managing my thoughts and views that I didn't even consider more than one college, I simply applied to the closest one about a month before cles. I think it's important to be able to recognize what steps you've taken in life, the past, and the present so much so that it will give you a future. And as for a future career, I now know how important it is to have a goal in mind. I jumped into a liberal arts program AA degree in a couple years. I just think that after having been in my shoes for so long...not that long I'm only 20, but that I would know what it is I want to do...what I love or somethng like that. I know this because I've been researching since August of last year-2009. I've taken countless tests (personality.career) and thought a lot. I really don't think that a person like me would have any clear motives to pursue a career other than the simple fact of doing it..not that I don't enjoy life but I'm much more idealistic. SO I'm an artist, a lyricist/singer, an actor, a student, an athletic guy, a mindful man, a loner (I really don't have contact with my old life...), and a little bit of everything else...I think. So when I try to whittle a pure form of ambition out of such a melting pot I get lost and now I'm writing entirely too long questions on yahoo answers. I realize there's probably not a similar person out there who would stumble upon such a question, if that's what this is, and especially one who would have the answer. I'm currently going into my second semester with the idea that "I want to help people"...when really I just want to "be" people